Remembering 9/11- Ten years later

Ten years ago, I thought my world was crashing around me.  Let’s see…I was looking for a job as i had just lost both of mine, i was the only roommate who actually paid any bills, and being the one that paid most of the bills, some of my things had to get pushed off (like car and health insurance) My boyfriend was in the process of moving out of my house and was picking up the last of his things that morning.  I remember getting up to let him in the house, and going back to bed because my heart was hurting so much.  I just wanted to hide.  (Turns out him leaving was the best thing that EVER could have happened to me…I’m not sure if I knew it then, but it really was)

My dad called me and his exact words were “Turn on your TV, we’re under attack!”  I thought he was me just to wake me up (ask him about the shark and the dolphin).  I laughed at him and asked him why he was calling so darn early (I was a bartender and 9am is EARLY).  I got the TV on in time to see the second plane crash into the tower.  It was like everything stopped around me.  I remember feeling like all the air had been sucked out of the room and I was left gasping for breath.  As I watched the towers fall and learn of the other crashes I felt like the world was spinning out of control.  How does this happen.  Who does this?  I am not sure I had ever even heard the word “Al-Quaeda”.  I was at a loss.  I didn’t know how to feel.  Which emotion should I let rule?  I can tell you that it put my “horrid life” into perspective for sure.  How dare I complain of what that guy did and what my “roommates” did when there were people out there who just literally lost everything.

I went downstairs and made a pot of coffee and watched the news all day.  I couldn’t pull myself away from the TV.

I had a job interview that day for a serving position in Sandy Springs at Diggers.  And I got the job.  And instead of being happy that i was going to be able to pay my bills, I just felt empty inside.  All I could think about was all the people who said goodbye to their loved ones that morning.  All the loss.  It still breaks my heart.  It is so huge.  Almost too much to conceive-to grasp.

I had a roommate at the house before i moved who didn’t drive so I drove him to and from work.  I remember sitting in traffic on I-75S, not moving at all, and hearing what seemed to be a foreign sound.  It was an airplane coming from Dobbins AFB.  I hadn’t heard or seen a plane in two, three days?  I rolled down my window and just stared up at the plane in the sky crying.  Looking around the parking lot that was 75S, there were others doing the same thing.   What I was feeling in that moment was a combination of fear (was it happening again), anger, pride and sadness.  It was overwhelming.

I started training at Diggers that week and was on the floor a week later.  A couple months later, I moved out of my house in Woodstock and into an apartment in Sandy Springs about 3 miles (if that) to Diggers.  I was working at Diggers full time-no second job (first time in a long time for that) and me and Sweetie Peetie settled into our new life without the jerk that had made me cry so much. He was my last bad boyfriend.  She was quite glad to be rid of him as well.

That job opened up several opportunities for me over the next few years, even though i only worked there for a year.  After Diggers, I went on to bartend again, (which was something that wasn’t going to happen at Diggs…) and from bartending into management.

There have been a lot of people come and go in my life in the last ten years.  Some that I thought were just a flash in the pan turned out to be lifelong friends.  Some that I thought would be lifelong friends turned out to be very shabby people. And then there are a couple that come into your life and you know you will always have them, no matter the distance.

It’s funny how life works.  When I thought my world was falling apart around me ten years ago, I saw the bigger picture.  I am forever changed by that.  I am now settled down with the love of my life, two dogs and a life I wouldn’t trade for a million dollars.  God is good and I am blessed.

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